Cain's Comments Come Calling

Please take 20 minutes, follow the link below and watch Susan Cain's presentation:

Susan Cain's take on Introverts

It has been a while since I have blogged, and to be honest, it is largely due to facts of my life that are not included in introversion. 

However, I will not start this blog, belaboring issues, which do not pertain to the above link, or the proposed topic. 

I found Cain's perspective quite interesting. I believe her topic, by nature, made her out to slightly be an apologist for introverts (a people that might very well need one); however, her presentation was well balanced and thoughtful. 

The mere delivery screamed introvert within minutes of its start. But, the beauty of the presentation was not it her delivery, but in her articulation of complex ideas. This is a trait, not solely attributed to introverts, but often attributed. 

Now I am not here to critique her presentation. But as I scrolled through some of the comments posted on Ted.com, I realized the complexities of the debate. The truth is, no matter where you fall, it can be clearly seen we live in a culture, dictated and polarized by the charismatic. We see this in politics, sports, education, advertising, sales, and even the church. 

I recently watched a documentary entitled, "Expelled". I would encourage anyone to watch this. Although the overall topic is unrelated (Intelligent Design vs. Darwinism Evolution) the concluding point cannot be correlated enough. The documentary concluded with a point: although they (makers of documentary) did not advocate one over the other, they did show throughout the presentation that Intelligent Design has no credence in the world of academia or scholarly conversation. 

I would not propose it is exactly the same as Introversion and Extroversion, but, one side by its very nature takes precedence over the other. Whereas I do not believe an extrovert/all extroverts are to "blame" for this, I do believe realizing we live in a world that is drawn to characteristics more often found in extroverts. For it is this very reason we unknowingly advocate an extroverted lifestyle, where to some it fits perfectly and to others it is to their detriment. 

I am an introvert. One, who has struggled many times with my "introvert identity". Going into a profession such as ministry, you are often compared to the charismatic orators; the dynamic leaders; and the expressive evangelists. 

I have often been overlooked in ministry/interviews/activities... I of course, like many other introverts have some extroverted qualities, which at times can make it appear I am outgoing. However, my true state and natural self, enjoys quite solitude. 

I have often been asked: Why don't you react this way? Why are you so composed? 

At the time, I had no answer. But now, looking back I suppose I appear composed on the outside because I react on the inside. I would imagine for an extrovert reading this, it is probably getting confusing right now. But I would also venture a guess most introverts not only hear but resonate. 

So in conclusion: If you are an extrovert regularly in relationship with introverts I have several insights that may or may not be of help. 

1) Take into consideration, at times your "extrovertedness" expressions can result/bring out the "introvertedness" in your friends or family. 2) You may get easily frustrated with your friend/families quietness, but I encourage you, although it would be easy for you to dominate the conversation, use your extrovertedness to invite the introvert to share. 3) Although you react to situations differently, please understand that an introvert is probably reacting the same way! just not expressing it in the same light. 

If you are an introvert regularly in relationship with extroverts. I have several insights that may or may not be of help. 

1) Take into consideration, at times your "introvertedness" brings out the "extrovertedness" in your family and friends. 2) You may FEEL stifled and overpowered, but remember, your extroverted friends/family are just reacting the way that suits them best. I encourage you, to fight through those feelings and realize the good intentions/personality paradigm. 3) Remember, that you may not feel the need to speak up, or share your heart... but 9 times out of 10, your friends/family are there because they want to hear you when you speak.

Above all, we are different. Love is not only admiring each other for our differences but accepting each other in spite of them. Realizing our differences add depth that at the outset was never seen...

This is a poem I am writing for the conclusion of my Sermon, which takes a detailed look into the Holy Land as I experienced it. Thought I should share:

We have taken a little tour, to a place that is worshipped and revered
One that has so much History, and Holy in its years

I traveled to the distant land, expecting my journey to be enriched
I walked in the steps of our Lord, but never found my niche

You see, even in its wonder, marvel, and gaze
After the initial excitement the Holiness fades

Its become about business, money, and store
What once was Holy, is Holy no more

This tells us something about what we often revere
Our houses, jobs, and possesions, nothing severe

When you travel to that foreign land, its not all the things you can see
In fact, its what you can't see, thats key

All the pathways, rivers, buildings, and more
With all the synagoges, markets, structures, and doors

All the trinkets, gifts, and junk to spare
All the pictures, memories, and stories to share

Its not what you take away, that resides in your heart
Its what you never found, thats the largest part.

Just like the men and women of old
 atleast as far as the story goes

They came to the place where "Holy" lay
Only to find he had risen that day

As much as this trip changed how I share
It wasn't because of what I found there

Now this is the greatest story all
The story of a risen Savior never to fall!!!

it is not my faith in Christ that saves me...

The following is an essay by Charles Spurgeon from his Morning and Evening:

“Looking unto Jesus.” –Hebrews 12:2

It is ever the Holy Spirit’s work to turn our eyes away from self to Jesus; but Satan’s work is just the opposite of this, for he is constantly trying to make us regard ourselves instead of Christ.

He insinuates, “Your sins are too great for pardon; you have no faith; you do not repent enough; you will never be able to continue to the end; you have not the joy of His children; you have such a wavering hold of Jesus.” All these are thoughts about self, and we shall never find comfort or assurance by looking within.

But the Holy Spirit turns our eyes entirely away from self: He tells us that we are nothing, but that “Christ is all in all.” Remember, therefore, it is not thy hold of Christ that saves thee–it is Christ; it is not thy joy in Christ that saves thee–it is Christ; it is not even faith in Christ, though that be the instrument–it is Christ’s blood and merits; therefore, look not so much to thy hand with which thou art grasping Christ, as to Christ; look not to thy hope, but to Jesus, the source of thy hope; look not to thy faith, but to Jesus, the author and finisher of thy faith.

We shall never find happiness by looking at our prayers, our doings, or our feelings; it is what Jesus is, not what we are, that gives rest to the soul. If we would at once overcome Satan and have peace with God, it must be by “looking unto Jesus.” Keep thine eye simply on Him; let His death, His sufferings, His merits, His glories, His intercession, be fresh upon thy mind; when thou wakest in the morning look to Him; when thou liest down at night look to Him. Oh! let not thy hopes or fears come between thee and Jesus; follow hard after Him, and He will never fail thee.

the impending cloud...

“I start to feel like I can’t maintain the facade any longer, that I may just start to show through. And I wish I knew what was wrong. Maybe something about how stupid my whole life is. I don’t know. Why does the rest of the world put up with the hypocrisy, the need to put a happy face on sorrow, the need to keep on keeping on?... I don’t know the answer, I know only that I can’t. I don't want any more vicissitudes, I don't want any more of this try, try again stuff. I just want out. I’ve had it. I am so tired. I am twenty and I am already exhausted.” ~Elizabeth Wurtzel

Today is another one of those days. Depression has set in and I am not exactly sure why. I have lost my desire to interact with others, to read books, and really to do anything productive. I just want to be by myself and let my brain waste away not thinking about anything. I sometimes believe it is compensation for my over thinking. I often analyze things that have not happened and ultimately, I become low at heart just thinking about them. There are always expectations, and those expectations are if you are happy and fun, I will care about you and sit with you but when you are low and sad I will wait until you are ok. There is a fundamental flaw in this. The fact that we as a natured people are flawed and not 

ok creates a dilemma. Is there really such a thing as “ok”. And if there really is, why are we broken people obsessed with it? I myself struggle often with the opposing problem. I mellow in the mud that surrounds. Lately, I don’t feel as though I have done that. But, I have realized this cloud coming over me and I have chosen to ignore it until now. I don’t realize its arrival until my actions vary greatly from normal. This is not foreign to me. I have struggled with this for a long time. I truly believe that because of my temperament and personality I am more prone to symptoms of depression. I don’t know how I am supposed to deal with it though. Am I supposed to go to a doctor and take medication for depression for the rest of my life? Will a pill magically take it away? Or am I supposed to do nothing and just wait it out each time? It is an exhausting experience and often overwhelming, and forgive the expression, depressing. I need a Savior. One who knows no bounds. Simply Jesus. I need someone who knows what it feels like to be covered by darkness with an extreme weight on his shoulders. I need Jesus. I need him more than ever. Not because I want to get rid of this depression but because he is the light of this world. The light that shines through the darkness (John 1). I find myself wanting others to sympathize with my pain, but I realize all to often I am asking too much of them. People who have never struggled with depression don’t really understand the pain and direness of the situation. They often believe it is just a decision about attitude and then its done. Johnathan Davis says it best:

“A lot of people don't realize that depression is an illness. I don't wish it on anyone, but if they would know how it feels, I swear they would think twice before they just shrug it.” 

What they don’t understand is people who truly struggle with depression are those who have tried and tried again to make that decision but they are still consumed by darkness. Depression is a passive aggressive demon, lurking in the midst. It’s never something that jumps out but rather comes with time and progression. As Frances Perkins puts it,

“... with the slow menace of a glacier, depression came on. No one had any measure of its progress; no one had any plan for stopping it. Everyone tried to get out of its way.” 

 I offer no solution because obviously I have not come by one. However, I am often shaken by the words of Spurgeon who calls our attention to Christ. The question is not, if I focus on Christ then will it go away? The question is better stated, if I focus on Christ, will it even matter? Satan, has tricked us all into the most fundamental of all sins, selfishness. In the garden he tricked Eve by implying God as a withholder. Essentially within that very implication, something must be assumed. If God is a withholder, he must be withholding from someone or something. In this, Satan finds his most elaborate attacks on God’s people. We have been tricked into thinking the Christian life is about us. We have been fooled into concentrating on our own problems and issues. We have been deceived into thinking we are a deprived people and as long as we ask God in the name of his will we may receive it. However, I pose a question, in those prayers, do we really pray to a living God. Or could we replace God in that sentence, with “Oh magical storehouse of solutions”. So essentially the prayer would be, “Oh magical storehouse of solutions, please get me out of the impending gloom of depression”. 

Your wondering, what is he really getting at? 

The point: Are we so focused on self that in our prayer the emphasis is put on what WE gain, and who he is so undermined it could be replaced by the most ridiculous of statements. Have we actually come to this? Really, think about your own prayer life. We have become a product based people, a solution based entity. Not a producer based people or solver based entity. We often come to the Great Throne of God and receive the very blessings of which we ask only to turn around and walk right back into the bowels of hell with it. It is in those very blessings that we see the greatest manifestation of our God, and Satan has used that very thing to distract us from what we need most; A Savior. 

Now how does this tie into the talk of depression?

Listen I have no idea what your vice may be. Mine is depression. However, no matter what it is you struggle with, there is a fundamental flaw in the way we have been taught to handle it. What we need is a SAVIOR, not a temporary solution. I am by no means saying we should ignore our problems, in fact quite the opposite. We should embrace them all the while uplifting them to Christ.

The question is not, if I focus on Christ then will it go away? The question is better stated, if I focus on Christ, will it even matter?

The problems we face in this life may never go away, but it is the very Person of Christ, that sets us free. 

the woodcutter...

One day a woodcutter took his grandson into the forest for his first experience in selecting and cutting oak trees. These, they would later sell to the boat builders.

As they walked along, the woodcutter explained that the purpose of each tree is contained in its natural shape: some are straight for planks, some have the proper curves for the ribs of a boat, and some are tall for masts.

The woodcutter told his grandson that by paying attention to the details of each tree, and with experience in recognizing these characteristics, someday he too might become the woodcutter of the forest. A little way into the forest, the grandson saw an old oak tree that had never been cut. The boy asked his grandfather if he could cut it down because it was useless for boat building- there were no straight limbs, the trunk was, short and gnarled, and the curves were going the wrong way. 

“We could cut it down for firewood”, the grandson said.

“At least then it will be of some use to us.”

 

The woodcutter replied that for now they should be about their work, cutting the proper trees for the boat builders; maybe later they could return to the old oak tree. After a few hours of cutting the huge trees, the grandson grew tired and asked if they could stop for a rest. The woodcutter graciously obliged and sat down with his grandson in some shade. After they had rested a while, the woodcutter explained to his grandson the necessity of attentive awareness and recognition of everything in the forest and in the world. Some things are readily apparent, like the tall, straight trees; other things are less apparent, requiring closer attention, like recognition of the proper curves in the limbs.

And some things might initially appear to have no purpose at all, but until you sit in its’ shade do you find its’ purpose, like the gnarled old oak tree. 

the poor little mouse...

There was once a little rodent, he was a mouse

One that lived blissfully, he lived in a house

It was in that house, where he stayed in a room

One slight danger, the soft brush of a broom

Why stay in one room, when you have a whole house?

For is there such a thing as an unadventurous mouse?

The room was big, beautiful, and quaint

The mouse could run til he felt faint

Couches, chairs, dressers, and drawers

Tables, lights, windows, and doors

For if there was anything a mouse wanted, it was here

In this room filled with laughter and cheer

He had to be careful and watch for the shoes

But he loved the company and the fire’s hues

He was drawn to motion that occurred in his space

Always on the go, it was a special place

From gathering crumbs, to running flat out

This was what this room was about

So why stay in one room, when you have a whole house?

“Well why go anywhere else”, thought the mouse?

“It is this action, I want to be near

So for now I think I will stay right here”

The mouse remained for a while til one day he awoke

To loud noises, and out of his hole he was provoked

He scampered on out and to his dismay

A once bright and beautiful room, turned grey

He ran to and fro and looked all about

The room was empty, the furniture moved out

The windows were covered and the doors were shut

The mouse got a very sick feeling, in his gut

"What shall I do, where should I go?

For it is only inside this room that I know?"

The mouse pondered a minute then decided to lay

In the middle of the room where he used to play

It was there that he sat, and started to weep

He wept a while, til he went to sleep

One eye opened slightly, and the other did too

Another morning, with nothing to do

So what does one do in a room in a house?

That has nothing in it, except a little ole mouse?

Surrounded by nothing, lonely as can be

The little mouse looked up, and what did he see?

He saw a sign above the door’s crest

That said, “Beware, Vermin and Pests”.

Another sick feeling, came to his gut

His eyes once open, but now shut

The room was empty, and who was to blame?

The mouse knew it was he, and he lay there ashamed

There he lay in an empty room and vacant house

And that is the story of the poor little mouse…

Rain comes down...

On the brink of the unknown, when the gun goes off will you be caught on the blocks… or will you find yourself trying to swim?

Pitter pit pat, the rain falls down

Gray clouds congest the sky

Water falls from heaven to the ground

And to think we have no clue why

A brisk wind breaks across my face

And from puddle to puddle I keep on

A rainy day, a common disgrace

but I pushed forward strong

I expected differently from my state

But a simple smile shone through

Satisfied with what is upon my plate

Still left, not sure of what to do

Trying out trust, is a foreign concept to me

But an effort that must be made

Just like the small plants extend their leaves

To absorb the water with each blade

I walked with a beat I did, a casual stride

A dreary day it was, but my head held high

“I can handle this trust thing”, everything else aside

He is looking out for me, a fact I cannot deny

My feelings are liable to change day by day

But I must rely on what I know

Remembering, He is the way

because the Bible tells me so

There is peace in this trust I cannot explain

One that permits an effulgent smile

A peace, like the soft fall of rain

Present even in great trial

And so with the drop of rain atop my head

A gleam of hope appears

Excited for what is ahead

In the coming years

Rain still falls, with the same ole sound

with clouds that plaster the sky

But with the rain blessings come down

And to think we have know clue why

"A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song."

~Maya Angelou